Ice-cold Shoulder

ben kindlon

She’s all I can think about.  There is nothing distracting enough to keep me from thinking of her. Sleep doesn’t even act as a safe haven from these slaloming thoughts. They always seem to carve deep turns through the snow-covered forests that are my dreams.

Just weeks ago we were planning our upcoming trips together. All the fun we were going to have.

Now, I can barely even look at her.

The air in the room tells me the feeling is mutual. Since my most recent skateboarding injury, I’ve been unable to shred. My sweetheart, Cecelia, is upset that I can’t ride her.

Snowboards can be pretty demanding of their owners sometimes.  And this relationship is no different.

Killington was the first of Vermont’s ski areas to open for the 2013-2014 season.  The mountain opened its lifts to the public on Oct. 26, and even had an early-season rail setup for the kids ready to jib.  The GBP crew just released an edit showcasing a daylong session in mini-park they had in place at Killington, which the team absolutely destroyed.

The edit was truly impressive. I thought, if guys are throwing down this hard in November, we can all expect to witness some pretty big doings in the park this season.

For weeks I’ve been stretching and praying in a hopeful attempt to heal my leg.  In the time since Killington filled its first chairlifts of the season, Loon Mountain in New Hampshire had its opening weekend. Even Hunter, the closest mountain to New Paltz, started blowing snow this week.

As the East Coast’s winter steadily shifts into second gear, guilt and anxiety consumed me as I sat on my couch watching the opening day edits on Snowboarder.com.  After all this time contemplating the shred, I felt as if Cecilia and my dreams had been crushed.  I waded into despair, sighing in response to the shooting pains that shot through my leg.

It’s tough, but the pain is part of the challenging game of life, especially as an Eastern boarder. The consequences of your injury may seem like the most important, attention-consuming matter to think of.  It’s crucial to remember that it isn’t.

The most important part of an injury is maintaining positivity throughout recovery.

I went hard with Sherane, my skateboard, this fall. Despite the fiery frustration I carry over hurting myself riding her instead of Ceclia, and having it happen directly prior to the start of my preferred season, I can’t say I regret my actions with her.

I’ve always loved snowboarding more than anything, and have tried to devote myself to the sport to the point of putting it before anything else. When I feel the sad, disappointed vibes from Cecilia and start to feel guilty, I need to remind myself that our relationship isn’t as black and white as I sometimes think it to be.  The abuse is mutual; she’s put me through a hell of a lot too.  Cecilia also needs to understand that skating Sherane was only done to help improve my style, thus improving our relationship in the long run.

It’s hard to feel like I’m missing out on as much as I am, but I’m going to try to stay optimistic.  Cecilia and I will have our time, as soon as I’m healed and we can session together. When that time finally comes, I’ll give her a hot wax and have her sliding down the hill in no time.

Board-love is hard, but it’s worth the pop.  East Coast, beast coast. Later skaters.